fumofu

My memory is fading very fast. Here are bits and pieces of it.

Getting that catheter in was bad news. It resulted in me having very bad bladder control (i.e. urinary incontinence). At the hospital, I had absolutely no control and thought it was actually amniotic fluid! until I tried squeezing my Kegels midstream and nothing happened. Now, a month later, I have regained some control – maybe 50%. But whenever I sneeze or cough, I still wet myself. It was nice not having my period for 9 months and dealing with sanitary pads. But now it’s pay back time because I’ve been wearing pads since delivery. Sucks.

Let’s talk hemorrhoids. Pregnant people get them. I had a little skin tag before that worsened during pregnancy. After delivery, the hemorrhoid has not gone down. I’ve also heard horror stories from Patricia about the first bowel movement after delivery would be painful and epic. It took a good two days for me to ingest enough food to generate No. 2. But I did it. And good thing it was pretty uneventful. Just funny that every time the nurse comes in to check on me they ask if I’ve pooped yet. I even read on forums that some hospitals won’t release patients until they’ve pooped, just to make sure things are working on that end.

I enjoyed my labor with Avery. There aren’t that many things I would’ve changed. I felt a bit uncomfortable about getting the episiotomy, only because I was not informed about it. But I understand that Dr Kent decided to perform it only because it was necessary (we had discussed this at one of my OB appointments). My one regret about this whole experience was not being able to breastfeed Avery right after delivery when he was placed on my chest. If I am fortunate to do this again, the one thing I would request is this.

Because breastfeeding is the most painful thing I have experienced. Yes, contractions were painful. Delivery was painful. But that was less than 12 hours of my life. Breastfeeding had been challenging and painful right from the start. Almost 5 weeks later, it still is a bit painful. But I don’t have to take ibuprofen anymore. Avery and I had latching problems right from Day 1. At Patricia’s suggestion, I used a breast pump and spoon fed Avery little bits (not even by the dropful) of colostrum during my time at the hospital. I requested visits from lactation consultants on both full days that I stayed at the hospital. They were helpful, but looking back I did not make good use of their help. My nipples were sore, scabbed, chafed, and misshapened. The pain was so awful, my instinctual reaction was to rock myself to ease the pain. I called the nurse hotline from Albert’s insurance twice. The night we got home (Wednesday, 8/4/2010), I called in tears because I gave up and decided to feed Avery a bottle of formula. Thank God Albert only gave Avery 0.5 oz of milk and stopped.

I’m so happy I’ve persisted in breastfeeding. It really is the best gift I’m giving to my child. I am so grateful for the women at the support group I go to at the hospital once a week. Just to enter into a room full of women with their babies of varying age, knowing that they have gone through what I had been experiencing, alleviated a lot of stress. When I went in to last week’s meeting, there was a woman with a 6-day old baby. She was going through everything I had gone through. It’s funny how much has happened in 3 weeks. Yes, it still sucked at 4 weeks with Avery, but we had definitely made progress. And just these past 2-3 days, I feel like I can exclusively breastfeed Avery to at least 6 months, when he starts taking solid foods.

There had been several nights when Avery’s crying because he was hungry and I was reluctant to feed him because of the pain. Poor Albert is not one to hold his tongue when he’s tired and frustrated, and was not the most supportive person at 3am. I think in the ideal situation if I had constant positive support I would not be as stressed. But yeah, I’ll still be hard on myself. That’s just my personality.

It hasn’t been 5 weeks yet, but I have wracked up so many happy memories of our little boy. Like how his little lips made noises when I was burping him, and Albert and I cracked up when I was patting him in rhythm. Or how yesterday I was telling Albie that I was worried because Avery had pooped yet, then he proceeded to poop out of his diaper and into my shirt that I had just put on 2 minutes prior. This resulted in us taking a bath together, and the relaxed look on his face when I sprayed warm water on him is just priceless.

It is still a lot of work taking care of our little stinker, but even just a month’s experience as parents I’m finally feeling like I have a handle on things, and I can regain some of my own life back.

My next hurdle: Avery’s next growth spurt when he’ll want to feed constantly (even though it feels that way now), and Albert playing at an ultimate tournament next weekend. I’m planning on going to my parents’ place, but haven’t decided if I’ll be spending the night. I’ve been trying to let Albert sleep through the night, but exception for one night it has yet to happen. My parents are in no shape to hold a crying baby for 1-2.5 hrs at 4 in the morning.

I bought a baby memory book so I could record things. I need to get back on track! And yes, I will update Avery’s photos soon. That is, once I inform Albert about it. ;)

Guess what? Kid woke himself up and is crying like a maniac. Time to nurse again!

The following posts are mostly for my benefit, so I can chronicle the events to the best of my memory (which already is slipping). Feel free to skip.

I had been getting irregular contractions off and on the week before Avery’s birth date. I wasn’t even sure they were Braxton Hicks contractions or real labor pains. We were still in the midst of getting the house unpacked (actually we haven’t moved everything yet, and I still have a suitcase full of clothes sitting in the master bedroom). Sunday, 8/1/2010, we went to Albert’s parents’ house for another round of stuff. We stayed for dinner, during which I started getting somewhat regular contractions (as Albert’s mom was saying, “Any day now!”). Having read about other women’s labor stories and knowing there may still be some time before we could leave for the hospital, I kept quiet. But at 8:30pm back in Mountain View, I was getting regular contractions every 8 minutes. Good thing I downloaded a contractions calculator app on my DROID months before! I informed Albert, that there was a possibility that we would go to the hospital tonight. We both started packing up last minute items. Contractions became more frequent, but still not frequent enough to garner a trip to the hospital. We decided to go to bed.

I woke up at around 1:30am and restarted calculating my contractions. I had trouble figuring if I was really having a contraction. But little did I know things started becoming regular every 3 minutes. Albert started brushing his teeth and doing his morning routine. “Who knows when I’ll have the opportunity to wash up?!” is what he said. He got into some sort of battle mode all on his own – cute. :) We checked into L&D at O’Connor Hospital in San Jose at around 3:30am. I was in the triage room, where the nurse strapped me in for NST (non-stress test) to measure my contractions and baby’s heartbeat. They wanted to confirm that I was having regular contractions, and that I was starting to dilate. I think I had to be having contractions every 5 minutes and dilated 3cm at a minimum. The nurse stretched my cervix to 3cm (don’t remember if it was painful or not, but most likely minimal compared to my contraction pains) so that I could be admitted. By then my contraction pains were so bad, I was leaning onto the left side gripping the bed post as hard as I could. Just like all the labor stories I had read, I was perfectly fine in between, but during a contraction a sharp pain surged through my body, incapacitating all my rationale. I think at this point Albert got a bit worried.

I had this silly idea that I would try to stall getting an epidural as long as possible, knowing that getting one may delay labor, to the point where I would stop dilating and would require a Caesarian birth. So when I was finally admitted, I told the attending doctor that I would start with pain medications in my IV. What happened next was the most painful part of the whole ordeal: Getting the needle in for the IV. The nurse tried and failed three times. I have 3 throbbing bruises on my hands. Good thing it was the end of the nurse’s shift. She called the head nurse for help, who quickly stuck a needle in me. Felt like a quick pin prick, just like how it was supposed to be done. So the pain meds came, but didn’t do much. It dulled the underlying pain, but did not reduce any of the contraction pains at all. So I immediately requested for an epidural. Bad thing was I was a bit loopy from the intravenous pain meds, and Kathleen, my new attending nurse, had to wait til I was alert enough to make a conscious decision to get an epidural.

When Winnie was in labor for Mason’s birth, Eric passed out when she got an epidural. So I told Albert to buck up. Fortunately he was a champ and helped me get my epidural uneventfully. And boy was I glad the epidural was effective (apparently some women are not as lucky as me). The anesthesiologist (I forget his last name, Dr S) was wonderful.

As a funny side story, Dr S and Kathleen were chit chatting about the tape used to secure the epidural needle. Somehow in my delirious state, and I was sitting up with Albie facing me, I asked him if he remembered to take painter’s tape from his parents’ house in San Jose earlier in the day. As if I had nothing more important to concentrate on, my OCD mind had to wander off to other thoughts.

Anyways, I was finally drugged up at around 6am. I really wanted to sleep, and had Albert ask Kathleen if it was OK for me to rest. She chuckled, saying “Of course! Now is the time to regain energy so you can push the Baby out!” I must’ve slept for a good 5+ hours, on my sides with Kathleen helping me by placing a wedged cushion on either side of my back. I also had to have a catheter put in on my urethra because I could not use the toilet after having gotten the epidural. By 11:30am or so, I started feeling pressure and the need to push. Albert called for Kathleen, who immediately said, “Don’t push yet!” Well, it’s a bit hard not to! But she quickly checked that I was fully dilated to 10cm, and prepped for delivery.

We started “practicing” how to push. Albert held onto my left leg, Kathleen my right. She showed Albert that as I pushed he’ll have to push back on my foot. That woman must be buff, coz I pushed against her with all my might! She taught me that I had to envision myself, basically, pooping. To wait for the rise of a contraction until I can no longer hold it in, then to push while holding my breath like I’m taking a dump (her words, not mine…). I had trouble pushing, until Kathleen had her fingers in my cervix. It was good to feel something in there so I could something tangible to push out of my va-jay-jay.

To be continued…Avery’s crying.

Pushing took about an hour. Like I said, it was hard synchronizing the correct way of pushing while holding in my breath just at the right window during a contraction. I couldn’t think or talk well. But Albert was trying to give me support by telling me what a great job I was doing and holding my hand. Little did he know that the 3 failed IV insertions resulted in very very sensitive hands. I was not a happy camper when he tried to squeeze my hand. Anyways back to pushing. Soon though, Kathleen commented that she could see hair! The hurdle now was to push the head (the largest body part of the baby) out. It was like taking two steps forward and one step back. Every time I pushed the head protruded a bit more, only to squeeze back in. At various point of this hour I thought I had actually pooped, since I felt liquid spewing out. I guess that was amniotic fluid. At one point I started feeling pain. I even asked Kathleen, “I’m feeling pain, is that normal?” to which she replied, “Yes, it’s the ring of fire, it’s normal. Just keep on pushing!” Right after she said that the pain went up several notches. OMG, how is that head going to come out? I don’t remember how long the ring of fire lasted, but after an arduous hour of pushing, I finally felt a gush of fluid being released as Avery’s head came out.

The epidural definitely did its job properly, because I did not feel anything when Dr Kent gave me an episiotomy, which resulted in me getting stitches. I barely remembered what happened next. Dr Kent pulled the rest of Avery’s body out and allowed the cord blood to flow back into his body. He asked if Albert wanted to cut the cord, and I insisted that Hubby do so. The other nurse (I forget her name) performed the APGAR test on Avery. He scored 9 out of 10 both times, which is great! All was a blur until this little creature was placed on my chest. That’s when I teared up. You can definitely see my watery eyes in the photos. And of course, being his daddy’s boy, Avery had his first poop while lying on me. So I have black tar meconium on my stomach. We took a photo for evidence.

I’m forgetting a lot already, and it’s only been a month. I look back now at delivery day and it really wasn’t that scary or painful (after the epidural kicked in…).

I’m very grateful to Dr Kent and Kathleen. They were an excellent tag team. I would not have had such an amazing experience had it not been those two. Even Dr S, who stopped after after delivery to check up on me and to congratulate us.

Albert and I welcome our baby boy, Avery Ying Yuk Chu (朱英昱), on Monday, August 2, 2010 at 1:24pm in San Jose, California. 6 lbs 12.78 oz (3084 g) and 19 in (48 cm), right on time on his expected delivery date.

He is the most precious thing I’ve ever laid eyes on. I couldn’t help but get weepy just moments after giving birth to him (I’m getting weepy now just typing this).

Here are some photos to share. We’ll keep adding photos from time to time.

Will blog more about the entire experience once I get more sleep…

Current Mood:  exhausted

The house is coming along. We bought a lot of furniture this past weekend in exchange for an arm and a leg. Went into Restoration Hardware and somehow left with an expensive lamp for Baby. At least his room has lighting now! unlike our room…

Storage is a problem in the house, so we’re trying different ways to fit all our stuff (things we finally splurged on when we moved to the house last year, wonderful kitchen goodies from our family and friends off our wedding registry, and our purchases within the last week). Yesterday we went to Lowe’s and bought a pantry cabinet, opposite of the space where my kitchen work surface will go. I am so excited! The kitchen is almost done.

I’m arranging my clothes as we speak. Baby stuff will be next. Oh, I gotta finish packing my hospital bag. Just a few miscellaneous things left .

My feet, ankles, and hands are perpetually swollen.. Some days are better than others, but at night they get poofy like Pillsbury dough boy’s. Albert gets a kick out of squishing my hands. Baby is getting very cramped now. I can’t tell if I’m having contractions here and there, or he’s just punching/kicking me. Don’t come out yet; we’re not quite ready for you!

Finally seeing the light at the end of tunnel…only to  dive into the unknown.

I am house-stranded today because the rocker-glider is arriving. Hurry Fed-Ex guy! I have errands to run.

Saw another doctor today at my prenatal appointment. Maybe it’s because I’m not his patient, and his schedule may be impacted due to my OB’s absence, but he’s just not the same. When I see Dr Kent, I never feel rushed. All my questions are answered. I feel taken care of, that baby is doing fine, and that labor and delivery will go well. But today I saw this doctor for about 5 minutes. He had a student shadow him today. She totally missed out on Dr Kent being out of town!

As for the house, the painting is done! It’s not a perfect job, but it got done in 2 days and the house looks so much better with straight lines! and our color choices. Tomorrow the cleaners come to do their thing and steam the carpet. Saturday we’ll set up the nursery. Sunday we’ll move our bed with the help of Eric, Winnie and Mason. We’ll gradually move our stuff over from Albert’s parents house. Hopefully it’ll be done fairly quickly. I wanna stay put in our own place so I can focus on labor and delivery.

I bought a thermometer/hygrometer from Amazon for the baby’s room. I’m using it now in our current room. Thermostat outside is set at 80F (already way too hot). But the thermometer reads 83.1F in our room at 2am. Did I mention I’m 8 months pregnant? I’m past hot.

Baby is full term today at 37 weeks – yay! Just 3 more to go til EDD. My OB is in Hawaii for a primary physician conference. He got invited to give talks, so all his expenses are paid for. Lucky him! This means I can’t go into labor until he comes back. Last week I saw another OB at my prenatal visit because Dr Kent was on his way to deliver two babies. This one is less experienced, and she was more reserved. Maybe her style is just as effective as Dr Kent’s, but compared to him she just seemed lukewarm. I’ll be seeing yet another OB this week. Let’s see how this one fares.

I went to Milpitas police station yesterday to get the infant car seat properly installed. A great crash course on car seats and how to properly strap the kid in. It was quite a headache trying to get an appointment with the police department and AAA. One place told me its first available appointment is in September!

I have half of my hospital bag packed. I just put my first load of baby stuff in the washing machine. I was a bit worried that I haven’t gotten much hand-me-down clothes from Patricia. Then I put all the clothes in a pile and created a mountain. We’re good to go!

The painters are coming tomorrow and Thursday. Cleaners are coming Friday. We’ll be ready to move in this weekend! Woohoo!

Being homeowners is scary. Suddenly we are in debt for 30+ years. Logging onto Quicken and seeing our finances updated and organized used to be so much fun. Now it’s just depressing. Albert and I made a budget for June, and checking on it, now that the month has passed, is just sad. Needless to say we spent way above budget. At least the extra expenditure came from home improvement projects. But those are just the beginning. We still need to hire painters, and most likely upgrade the smelly fridge.

But we’re enjoying the prospect of our home (since we’ve only visited it a couple hours!). Knowing we will be settling into our own place for a long while has a safe feeling and calming effect. Albie counted the number of moves he’s made since exiting his parents’ house in Ohio for college. That’s 10 places in 12 years for him, 8 moves in 11 years for me. Along the way we’ve accumulated a lot of stuff, but we’ve also shed some of it away. Starting with a clean slate is exciting, but it will cost us! especially since we’re trying to stay away from IKEA. I guess the trick is to furnish at a slow pace.

We also bought a car for me yesterday (talk about cabin fever!!). It was by far the best car purchase process ever, since we asked for AAA-member pricing. No negotiations needed. The car salesman showed us the invoice, how much above that price AAA members are to pay. I wrote a fat check, and took home a shiny, spiffy new car. We were at the same dealership a few months back test-driving the 2010 model. The rattle really bugged. Plus the greasy sales guy didn’t inform us of AAA-member pricing, and badgered us mentally and psychologically for hours trying to coerce us into paying more than we wanted. In the end, I really didn’t want to pay so much for a rattling car. So here we are paying a similar price for a 2011 model, with no rattle. Woohoo! I love this car. Now I need to call the police station to schedule an appointment to get the infant car seat installed. Apparently there’s a one-month waiting list. I may have to head to Gilroy to avoid the lines.

We have most of the utilities set up at the new place, except for internet. I think we’ll try living without cable first. Wish us luck!

Happy 4th!

Addendum: Do not watch anything depressing on TV while pregnant. I just cried my eyes out watching “Deadliest Catch”. Caught the middle of an episode, even telling Albert it’s one where Captain Phil is still alive. Then I realized it’s the episode where he suffered his stroke in the wheelhouse. I couldn’t hold back the tears. It’s already sad, but even worse when I know the man passes away. RIP Phil Harris.

and that calls for smoothie-making time. I can finally dig out the miscellaneous ziplock bags of fresh fruit that I froze to prevent spoilage (grapes, strawberries, bananas). When Albert’s parents are here, fridge space is a high commodity (an aesthetic compromise made when we bought a counter-depth bottom freezer fridge). The Cuisinart blender we received off our registry from Justin & Meredith is a far cry from the <$10 blender I bought at Walmart during grad school days. It actually blends! instead of swirling the frozen fruit round and round. I forget to eat my fruit most of the time (I really should save room for it during dinnertime like I do with dessert when we dine out). Smoothies are a good way to make sure I get my daily servings in.

Looking forward to moving to Mountain View where the temperature is about 5 degrees lower. It’s further west, and the shared walls of the rowhouses probably contribute to the temperature as well. The last couple times we were at the condo the thermostat steadily read 74oF. We swapped out the old unit because Albie thought it was smoker-yellow; so I got to choose a spiffy blue-lit touch screen replacement – our first DIY project at the new place! :p In San Jose we set the AC at 79-80oF, which has been turned on by 5pm in the past 2-3 weeks. The weather will only get warmer as the temperature peaks. (I can’t fit my rings on anymore!) Makes me want to go to SF a little more so we can have a cold weather getaway. Just 4.5 weeks left before I get to pop this body warmer out!

Albert picked up the keys from our realtor’s office yesterday, which was quite anticlimactic. But the excitement sunk in a bit today, when we drove over to get the locks changed and the rusty water heater replaced. Good thing I took photos of us under the “Sold” sign, because the listing agent took it down later that day. I look fat and pregnant in my photo (you can see my outie belly button – eww!), so Albie will be the model.

Snapped this before heading downtown for lunch at Ramen House Ryowa (great noodle consistency, good overall). We love this neighborhood! Crossings Cafe across the street (with the red awning behind Albie’s head) has great mocha chai and a really yummy chicken sandwich. Caught the end of the USA – Algeria game while we were waiting for our order – a big thumbs up from Albie.

Just a couple more miscellaneous things to fix. The big expense will be getting the entire place painted. Then we can slowly move in. As long as we move our comfy bed and set up Baby’s crib (in his own room!) before I pop, we’re all good. Tried out free Google wifi today on Albie’s laptop. Signal is strong, but the speed was at snail’s pace. Guess it was too good to be true. We’ll probably get Comcast cable internet. Will hold off on TV until Albert can’t live without it come football season (only 2 months away).

The bank transferred funds to the title company today – woohoo! In less than 24 hours, the house keys should be in our hands. We’re so excited, and we just can’t hide it!

I celebrated by fixing myself a nice, big salad. I haven’t had a homemade salad in 6 weeks, ever since Albert’s mom flew into town. A bad excuse, I know. But without a car and being a lazy ass, it’s hard to get to the grocery store. Albert and I shared a package of spinach ravioli in pesto sauce. He paired it with clam chowder while I had my big salad. My one healthy pregnancy craving has been raw veggies – I think it’s the crunchy texture.

Went in for the ultrasound today. The tech at this imaging facility took a lot longer than the one from when we had our gender ultrasound. I drank 32 oz of water, as instructed, an hour before my appointment. A full bladder helps with getting a clearer image of the baby in that region. Good thing the tech measured Baby’s head first to get it out of the way so she could let me go to the restroom, conveniently located across from our room. Our little acrobat already has his head down, facing out. Hopefully he’ll rotate so he faces into my pelvis come delivery. His body measurements are symmetric; his heartbeat is nice and steady; he’s still a boy ;) – so nothing to worry about in terms of development. The tech just thinks EDD is 3 weeks later than our initial date. This means I have to carry this load around for longer than I thought – wah! Not only that, I’m gaining more weight than I would like… But what’s good is that we have more time to get the house ready before Baby comes, hopefully before Albert’s parents fly back to Ohio. I’ll have to confirm with Dr Kent about the new EDD when I see him Thursday.